ParentBlogging Conferences: Now With More Chest Hair

Posted on 20. May, 2010 by Brian Reid.

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I wrote last month that the world of blogging confabs — where blogger talk to each other, and marketer try to talk to bloggers — was opening up to dads with the launch of the Modern Media Man event in Atlanta this autumn. This was a big deal because though there are bunches of mommyblogger conferences (I can’t keep them all straight), fathers are generally on the wrong side of the velvet rope. (And even when they *do* get it, it tends to be a fish-out-of-water kind of thing.)

So I’m curious about the news that the Type A Mom Conference now has a dad track at their autumn event (in Asheville, NC). While it is tempting to whine about being splintered off into our own little ghetto, I’m actually tickled that the effort has been made.

The big question, though, is whether the dadblogger community is large enough, connected enough or conference-mad enough to really have an impact at multiple events. The M3 conference and the Type A conference will be separated by 2 weeks and 200 miles. Can both thrive?

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Dads and Workforce Re-Entry (and New Stats!)

Posted on 19. May, 2010 by Brian Reid.

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The Wall Street Journal yesterday tackled the thorny issue of dads re-entering the workforce. This is by no means a new topic (the WSJ did essentially the same piece as early as 2003), but I’m always interested in the anecdotes.

According to this week’s piece, by work-family guru Sue Shellenbarger, it really is tough out there for dads, who face some pretty severe stigmas when they drop out of the workforce to take care of the kids. How severe? Shellenbarger suggests in the story’s lede that finding on on-ramp when you’re a stay-at-home dad is more difficult than if you’re a mom in the same situation:

Much has been written about the challenges awaiting at-home mothers who decide to return to work. Few of them, though, have a tougher time of it than the stay-at-home dad.

I have no doubt that re-entry is hard for at-home dads, but Shellenbarger doesn’t give us much context. Given that the current recession is hitting guys especially hard, I have to wonder if the number of job-seeking dads has driven away part of the stigma. In the go-go ’90s, a man out of the workforce (especially the upper-class guys profiled) was automatically suspect. Today, it’s much more common. Does that work in favor of the AHD? I would think so, but I don’t have any proof of that.

Regardless, the piece is well worth the read, as is the accompanying Juggle blog post, which gives some tips for guys looking for re-entry.

ALSO: The real scoop was actually buried. Shellenbarger writes:

A record 7.4% of fathers in married-couple families with children under 18 were home in 2009 while their wives worked, based on unpublished Bureau of Labor Statistics data set for release next week. That is up two percentage points from 2008 and the highest on record, says Sandra Hofferth, a University of Maryland family-science professor and researcher on family time use.

I’ll track down those numbers next week when they are released. This is likely to be a number that is far more reflective of the actual at-home dad numbers than the “official” SAHD stat estimate.

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Evolution of Dad: A Review

Posted on 19. May, 2010 by Brian Reid.

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So now that the kick-ass documentary Evolution of Dad officially shipping, I would like to tell you all, officially, to see the movie. In the interest of full disclosure, you should know that I was massive predisposed to like the films, since it delves deep into a topic near to my heart: the impact that active fathers play in the family. When I say it like that (“the role active fathers play in the family”), it seems utterly pedestrian. Yet the role of dad is really under-developed in pop culture and academia. To make a film on this topic really is radical.

As for the review: it’s one heck of a piece of work. Filmmaker Dana Glazer talks to absolutely everyone. Kyle Pruett, granddaddy of the study-dads movement? Check. Jeremy Adam Smith, eloquent defender of caretaking dads? Check. Joan Williams, the law’s best work-life defender? Check. And on and on.

The result is a hugely comprehensive look at modern fatherhood, touching on everything. It hits the history of dads (noting the idea that dads should be distant breadwinners is a recent social construction, not a biological imperative). It nails some of the key stats on why involved dads matter. It profiles Maryland state trooper Kevin Knussman, who sued (and won) after he was fired for putting family first. It follows NYC superdad Dallas Hayes around. Dana talks to working dads. He talks to college kids. Every angle gets covered.

But if you don’t need every angle covered, buy it for two things: the first is the opening montage of still photos and voiceovers, illustrating the range of different ways that fathers have touched the lives of their children. Powerful stuff.

The second reason to see the film is the moment that Dana busts an NYC Mommy and Me class (on film) for keeping him out for being a dad. I’ve said many times that I don’t think that daddy discrimination is as bad as some people make it out to be. Moms, in general, are not an insular clique looking to exclude men. But — even saying that — there are still places where dads are made to feel unwelcome, and anything that can be done to make those places seem petty and silly is a great victory for gender-neutral parenting. So that was a nice surprise.

If the film falls short anywhere, it’s that it tries to cover too much ground. You could take almost any topic that appears in EvoDad — divorced dads, non-dad father figures, the scientific literature — and blow that out into its own compelling feature. My hope, of course, is that other filmmaking (and writing) dads will realize that, and Dana’s work will spur even more guys (and women) to pay that kind of attention to dads.

As Dana’s film makes clear, we’ve come a long way. But there may even be more evolving to do. I look forward to the sequel.

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