The NY Times, Late to the Movement
Posted on 26. May, 2009 by Brian Reid in General
I know this is a month late, but — I assure you — you won’t be any worse off for having missed it: the New York Times stumbled across the trend of the economy creating involved fathers out of the rubble of the financial sector.
Now, let me give full credit to the Times. They appear to have actually tracked down a whole community of these guys, which is a damn sight better than a lot of the other reporting on this topic, which has tended to recycle the same few gentlemen (not that there is anything wrong with those fathers). But the general message isn’t new: “Holy crap, men around here are sudden being forced to parent. Can they possibly adjust to this new and alien lifestyle?”
The answer is — of course — that, yeah, the guys are doing just fine. It’s a bit weird with the new role (what new role isn’t), but no one appears to be off their rocker with misery. Which is no shock to the rest of us.
(I guess I cannot let it pass without notice that the so-called paper of record saddled the story with a headline that included the phrase “Mr. Mom.” So let me say to the headline writers of America, for the millionth time, “Mr. Mom” is — at best — a lazy, outdated phrase. At worst, it’s a pejorative. Please, please look for some alternatives.)
Reinventing Dad
26. May, 2009
I hear you about the “Mr Mom” crap….about as dated as calling Asians “Orientals”…out here in No. California, I’m still seeing mostly moms at my daughter’s elementary school, but we dads are beginning to make our presence known.
Will
26. May, 2009
Let the “Mr. Mom” faux outrage go. If you’re letting a non-offensive label get to you, then you need to reexamine your priorities.
And actually watch the film in question.
Working Dad
26. May, 2009
Hey RD, I agree the story was a bit of a retread. But, I liked how the writer raised the idea that dads bring different sometimes positive skills to parenting and the PTA. The story discusses the tensions this can create and the benefits. I give it a mixed review.
Rebel Dad
26. May, 2009
Will -
a) I appreciate the comment and
b) I know that “Mr. Mom” has a wonderful, uplifting ending in which we see that dad has grown as a parent and as a person, etc. etc. etc. but …
c) ask anyone to name what “Mr. Mom” was about, and I’ll bet you $5 they use the word “bumbling.” Look at any clip of that movie shown as part of a news report in the last 10 years. It’s disparaging. That’s not that big a deal, except …
d) what men do at home is not mother. They father. We’re not doing mom’s job, and it’s insulting to say otherwise. If I were to say to a boss, “Hey, you’re playing Mrs. Dad around here! You have an office in the executive suite, just like a guy. Wow!” I’d sound like a sexist jerk. Why should it sound any less stupid when you flip the genders?
Is killing “Mr. Mom” the most important social issue facing us? Nope. But it’s lazy shorthand for a lot of outdated notions of at-home fatherhood. We’d be better off without it.
— Brian
Hicks
29. May, 2009
Uhh, err, Mrs. Dad?