Posted on 19. Mar, 2004 by Brian Reid in General
I paid the nice folks at AOL Time Warner their $3.95, and took home my own copy of this week’s Time (cover story: “The Case for Staying Home”). My take? Like Mike, I was underwhelmed. Not much ground that Fast Company and the New York Time Magazine’s Lisa Belkin haven’t already covered.
I have no doubt that the trend is a real one, based on my own anecdotal experiences. And, to its credit, the story does a reasonable job of suggesting that work policies remain stubbornly family unfriendly.
But like the other rich-well-educated-moms-fleeing-the-workplace stories, dads weren’t mentioned at all. No explanation of why dads don’t appear to be feeling the same pull toward home, no details on why the idea of co-parenting seems to be in decline (replaced by “sequencing” … the idea that moms can slip right back into the workforce after a few years at home).
The implication that bothers me is that “the case for staying home” isn’t worth making to fathers. In the lead to the story, the frazzled working mom struggles with her 10-hours days and the childcare and the breakfasts and the pressure and the guilt. Dad usually leaves the house at about 5:30 a.m. No word on whether or not he feels work/family stress at all.
Then again, no one is asking him. “Opting out of the rat race,” as the cover puts it, is for “young moms.” The other side of Time’s message: Back to your desks, guys.
Michael Weber
21. Mar, 2004
We, at AOL Time-Warner, would like to thank you for shelling out $3.95 for our left-wing rag.
We are, however, disappointed at your review of our piece on “the case for staying at home.”
Don’t you understand that our basic philosphy doesn’t allow us to look into the Stay-at-home Dad lifestyle? Our elitist editorial board does not comprehend a man wanting to stay-at-home and not work themselves to death for peanuts while their kids are growing up. It’s against the Communist tradition.
carla
22. Mar, 2004
This is as good a post as any to throw in my $.02. There are an assortment of reasons why I don’t have kids (though I do have a stepson who stays with us about 30% of the time), including the fact that I didn’t meet my SO until I was over 40. However, it’s also the case that one of my criteria for having kids with someone was that I wouldn’t have to do all of the work of raising them, and that I wouldn’t have to be the one in charge of doing all the work associated with raising kids. I always thought a SAHD would be perfect, actually-I just didn’t meet any candidates. And I’m always terribly disappointed in women who go ahead and reproduce with some guy w/o ever probing on these issues; what a surprise that they end up annoyed and resentful and overworked.