Posted on 26. Feb, 2004 by Brian Reid in General
Given my mini-rants on Caitlin Flanagan’s suggestion that nannies are the (troubling) solution to housework woes and her refusal to hold men accountable, I’m not sure what to make of this jewel from iVillage. It’s all in good fun, and I was smirking, even if the bit managed to get to about the sophistication level of a comic strip. (i.e.: Ha ha. Those silly, lazy men and their silly, nagging wives.)
James F
26. Feb, 2004
Ugh… “Be passive-aggressive” is NEVER a good solution to anything. Unless you want to make me want to go back in time on a magic time rocket and prevent your birth. And that’s usually not the goal of the passive-aggressor.
Rebel Dad
26. Feb, 2004
Good to see you here, Mr. F. I hope any of your readers who accidently stumble this way won’t be put off by the earnestness and the utter lack mirth we cultivate and celebrate at Rebel Dad.
Zelda
27. Feb, 2004
You are an anomaly. You are the exception that proves the rule.
In many marriages (including my own), housework becomes a big ISSUE because men refuse to do an equal share; or refuse to perceive the inequality of this.
It’s much worse when the kids are small, and as a stay-at-home Mom, I can’t imagine how overworked the mothers with paying jobs must be.
In many relationships, when he takes the initiate to vacuum, for instance, both partners think of that as “helping her.”
I’m just stating the obvious, of course. I have a brother who is an anomaly like you. He is very involved with his family and is renowned for being a good cook. Perhaps that was due to the quality of parenting he received as a child.
Rebel Dad
27. Feb, 2004
Zelda -
I have to agree. Guys who help with cleaning, with the kids, etc. remain anomalies. My big challenge — and this usually comes up with regard to the children — is how to change that. I’m fairly certain that vacuuming in undergarments or being passive-aggressive isn’t the solution, but I’m at a loss for what the solution actually.
(And welcome!)
— rD
dayv glusing
27. Feb, 2004
Even before being an AHD I picked up most of the housework. My wife works hard and I appreciate her sacrifice, so I do what I can. There were time I actually wished she would help more. Maybe I should try cleaning in just my skivies and see what that gets me…..
Rebel Dad
27. Feb, 2004
We looked forward to hearing your report, Dayv.